Comments on: Marriage and other stuff I am meant to do

By: Suzanne

Suzanne — Fri, 14 Nov 2008 10:56:20 +0000

I met a wonderful chap from USA who was a visiting speaker to a professional clinic…. we were dining with a group of people from the conference and he curiously enquired why I was still single (after nine years separation). He qualified this as a compliment however, it was clear that the expectation was that the norm is to seek another partner. I enjoy my lifestyle, I’ve experienced several good relationships and still enjoy the privilege of having teenage boys at home.

I continue to attend functions and social events where often there are both parents or couples in attendance. I stubbornly refuse to let the ‘looks’ or comments deter me. I never cease to be amazed at behaviours and the pressure for social conformity in some workplaces as well.

However, on the other hand, I think human beings are gregarious beings and it is not always about conformity - poeple gravitate to people like themseves; people can appreciate differences…people need to invest of their time, energy and money in other people - how else do we grow in character and spirit; attributes like compassion and empathy quite often are developed from enduring relationships. There is an art in turning a chore into a joy

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 00:37:17 +0000

I am a 32 year old female who is happily married, has a thriving career and is a competitive sports person. I am thrilled to see an article written such as this. You see I don’t want children and yet everybody (except my husband) thinks I am naive or making a huge mistake - one I will alway regret. Even people whom I hardly know feel quite comfortable telling me that I will regret it, or one day I will want them and spend substantial energy trying to change my mind. My husband has a daughter and is quite happy that we do not have plans for children. I’m sick to death of being judged for this and of society telling me there is something wrong with me for not wanting them. So thank you for recognising the pressures society puts on people as to what we are ’supposed’ to do in our lives. It frustrates the hell out of me (and I’m generally a very happy and friendly person - which apparently means I would be a great mother so everyone tells me)
Anonymous.

By: Sylvia Elliott

Sylvia Elliott — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 22:22:35 +0000

Dear Craig
Thank you for this enlightening article on being ‘not normal’! Being 55 and single it makes real sense to me as I too have encountered many ‘match-making’ discreet and not so discreet attempts by friends and family. I love my lifestyle so thank you for sharing your ’state of mind’ with me.
Regards
Sylvia